Ha nicotine, you suck and I am beating the hell out of you!
Oh I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to shout, I miss you so much my friend. I dream of
the days we spent together, traveling, drinking coffee, driving to work,
taking a break at work, playing games on my phone, just before bed, just as I
woke up, waiting for a friend, in the courtyard at the pub, drinking beer. All that
is gone now, a fading memory but I will never forget you my beloved cigarettes
and all you have meant to me and done for me. Maybe one day we can be together
again but no……..I must not think this way, I must let you go because I love you
so.
Three weeks, three very long testing weeks. Of course the
morons came out to play and push my buttons in my first few days without a
smoke but something was different this time, I enjoyed the pain, I enjoyed
having to endure the stupidity of mankind that was pushed in my face like a
scabby strippers groin. I stayed the course through disaster and turmoil and out
rightly refused to relapse though temptation was so very high. I also gained a
new even more ridiculous habit, the electric cigarette. It looks like a real
one. The end lights up when you draw back on it like a real one. It even lets
you inhale some sort of vapour into your lungs and appear to blow out smoke but
you know what, it is not a cigarette. Yet for someone so hopelessly addictive
like me it has been a whole new thing for me to focus on and obsess over and
has helped in some strange way in situations where I may have weakened,
whatever works right?
I’m not sure at what point I can cross “quit cigarettes” off
THE LIST but it feels a little too early just yet however I have a very
handsome moustache of the “trucker" genus which currently is more of a Lemmy-Motorhead
growth (minus the warts) that I am quite happy with and can cross “grow a
moustache” off THE LIST. I will work it into a few styles over the next few
weeks until I get sick of it but for now, my first moustache.
Not thinking about cigarettes with a moustache |
Thinking about cigarettes with a moustache |
This coming weekend is the 10km and I have done next to no
training in the last week except some gym time so I’m just going to wing it and
hope I pull through easily enough this time just because I’m off the
cigarettes.
Next goals I am aiming at after completing the 10km are the
movie oriented goals as I commence a screenwriting course next week and have recently
joined discussions with a group of filmmakers. I should have a short film or
two written by the end of the month and also lock in some flight tickets for
the travel goals to be crossed off THE LIST early next year but more on that
after this weekends run.
wish me luck - luck shall play no part!
Simon.